Education
“It’s so important to learn to forgive…we hold on to things so intently and it doesn’t hurt anyone but ourselves.”Tinu has an incredible story to tell. She’s one of 13 children who’s dad was a prince of Lagos in Nigeria, making her a princess. Born with scoliosis, which is a form of curvature of the spine, Tinu needed to be in UK for her treatment – and because she was in and out of hospital for most of her childhood, she moved permanently to North London, where she ended up growing up. As of about the age of 3-4, Tinu didn’t have any contact with her dad – she had tried to reach out to him, but to no avail.Fast-forward to when she was 16, she entered a writing competition at school that the BBC were running, where they wanted students to write about their life story. Tinu won that completion and it saw her flying back to Lagos with a BBC crew, to confront her dad about why he had abandoned her.We talk about what it felt like as a 16-year-old to confront her dad, and the feelings of disappointment and rejection which plagued her earlier in life and after that incident, as well as how she’s found the strength to forgive and move on. Now as a mother of three children, the conversation inevitably goes into themes of parenthood, and those, sometimes hazy, lines between forgiving someone for their actions, and feeling like we’re compromising on our own values. This is a conversation, not just about forgiveness, but about so many other things. It’s about self-belief and self-conviction, it’s about understanding that all of us, regardless of where we come from or the issues we’ve had to overcome, have the right to feel accepted and loved, and to live a life defined by our own rules and not by our pasts.Thank you so much for sharing your story, Tinu – you’re an awesome person and I’m proud to call you my friend.Other episodes you may like:#26 Theshira Pather: Keeping the legends of Africa alive#22 Rochelle Gilburn: Finding your why#17 Lex Morningstar: Introversion, sensitivity and being human#4 Marion Hart: Our negative experiences don't define usFind out more about Tinu:Tinu’s blogFollow Tinu on InstagramJoin the Connections Untold community:InstagramFacebook