Education
Erich Fromm talks about "being", "doing" and "having" and self help generally glosses over the most important of these. We are sold on the idea of becoming the best version of ourselves: superbeings. We are told that once we have mastered the art of being then we can have and achieve whatever we want in life. What is missed out in this equation is that the only thing we really have in our power which is what we do Self help sells us on the idea that we can somehow flick a switch in our minds - or something like that - and magically become different people. If you learn to think like rich people you will become rich. If you can eradicate the weaknesses and faults in your personality then you will suddenly become a new person and the best version of you. We are sold this Kool Aid as if self improvement were nothing more than a surgical process where all you have to do is change your personality defects and lo, and behold! You will arise from the ashes of your "old" you as a brand new super-you The kind of self help that really works on the other hand is by necessity of a spiritual nature. This is because real self improvement and transformation requires that we do something that most self help books and gurus never mention: you have to do and be the best you can each and every moment you are aware. The focus should not be about being and doing what "successful" people do but being and doing what you know to be right. Like I say in this episode, success is not something you pursue but something you attract by virtue of who you become The late great Stephen Covey talked about the difference between what he called the "Personality Ethic" versus the "Character Ethic." He said pretty much the same thing that I am try to convey here. Self help generally focuses on your personality and superficial fixes that are meant to create success without the hard work of character building. You are told to make eye contact and repeat people's names in conversations and always have a firm handshake and things like that. On the other hand, true success comes from building your character one moment and thought and action at a time The key to whole thing is that if you focus specifically and relentlessly on doing the right thing and representing the best version of yourself at every point in time then everything else falls into place. You will feel good about yourself and you will automatically become the best version of yourself and yes, a super-you too. The problem is that we don't like being told to be good and do good. We want to be successful and do and have amazing things. Our focus is on the outward aspects of success and we feel that we can somehow engineer the best version of ourselves without being true to ourselves and focused on doing the right thing always