Comedy
There were no windows in the bathroom. This place had become his tomb —small with only a single sink and stall. He lay on the dirty linoleum, a young man with knees to chest and head to knees. He was weeping, a sound lost under the loud banging and commotion beyond the locked door. He knew then that It was only a matter of time before the wooden frame snapped and the horde rushed in. He wouldn’t let them take him —no. He would never become one of them no matter what. With solemn purpose he reached into his bag and withdrew the pistol he had found while being chased by the horde outside. He hefted it, felt its weight. He sucked in a sharp breath and held the gun quivering inches away from the side of his head. He took another breath, let it out, took in one more and counted to three in his head, one...two..three —he closed his eyes and squeezed the trigger. Instead of the expected sound of a thundering report of a discharged firearm, the young man was instead met with a celebratory kazoo sound. He dropped the gun and opened his eyes one at a time. He looked around and discovered his clothes dusted with what appeared to be brightly colored confetti and he saw that the pistol now had a mini flag protruding from the barrel with the phrase, “Wacky Wednesday!” written on it in comic book font. Before the young man had time to think however, the door blasted inward and in rushed the horde. Within seconds they had him surrounded, squeaking their red noses and bicycle horns, some even squirting water from fake flowers attached to their rainbow suspenders. The sounds, boy-yo-yoing! and bonk! were prevalent and frequent amidst the commotion. The young man knew he was doomed and in both horror and agony he cried out once, before drowning under the sudden deluge of japes and general tom foolery. Topics Discussed on Today’s Episode Include: Wacky Wednesday’s, Mr. Act One, Covid Closures, Iran’s Most Wanted, America: The Failed State Topics Discussed on Today’s JackAF: Jacks Comics Corner