Arts
I seize this moment to speak a little about Israel-Palestine. Oh, how I JAPE. ‘T’would appear that my sixty-two years on this marble and the enlightenment accrued therein count for goose-egg. That said, can enlightenment be ACCRUED? Or is it something at which one ARRIVES? There you go. Prima facie attestation to my sagacity. You may argue that raising a multitude of questions without attempting investigation is hardly exhibitive of brilliance. But I quip, brilliantly - do we venerate Dylan’s seminal protest song for its exegetical virtues? ‘It’s all just blowin’ in the wind, is it, Bob? Wanna elaborate?’ To be, or not to be, that is the question. ‘Come on then, Billy Shakes, which is it?’ I think not. As in, I don’t think such an inquiry is legitimate, I’m not just surmising an answer. Would you rather compile a stat-laden, diagram-pregnant tome or pose the query what spawned it? Don’t lie. You don’t even read, do you? As it happens, I did write a book - separate that fact from the preceding segment. Mine is an autobiography, I’m not being a hypocrite. If thou’ve been truly following Funlimited Entertainment (by which I mean actually perusing my prose - I refer you to Paragraph 4 for my inference re: this prospect), you’ll know or have known that Still Sings He has been in development for some time. Well, it’s been rejected. The publisher has quite viciously alleged that I come across as a “more pretentious and less self-aware Alan Partridge”, and that the proposed dust jacket design - stellated and equation-bedecked - “conveys a false impression of scientific substance or, at minimum, a sliver of wisdom.” My solicitor, Ignatius Pusk, has discouraged me from filing for slander - “less than baseless”, apparently. Look, I’ve a grandson on the way. Such commercial concerns are rendered comparatively frivolous. Besides, there’s always self-publishing. If I am to sacrifice cachet for anything, it’s unedited, untempered, untampered with RADIANCE. That is, if I have the energy to convert longhand to digital. I fear Pfidze’s looming wedlock will snatch her from my usance... I suppose I could always recruit another hapless vassal. Any takers?