Comedy
If your looking for old issues or want to share the podcast that’s attached please go to http://fullmetalchickeneggs.blogspot.com/"The next great civilization to arise was Ancient Greece, which came up with an exciting new governing concept called "democracy," from the Greek words dem, meaning "everybody gets to vote," and ocracy, meaning "except, of course women, slaves and poor people."---Dave Barry"The government announced that some voters will be allowed to vote online. That's going to be a tough choice: democracy or porn...democracy or porn."---Craig FergusonFMC: I swear this next thing actually happened.A Florida mother was arrested after police found her driving with beer buckled in the front seat but her toddler unrestrained in the back seat.Source: Bizarre News 02/09/08“I once made love to a female clown. It was weird because she twisted my penis into a poodle."---Dan WhitneyThe stranger someone looks the more likely they are not to do anything to you - that's really bad. For instance you never hear of a person being mugged by that chick with a dog collar, 12 inch spiked hair, a split tongue and so much leather that it looks like she just ripped the cow right out of its skin and modified it to fit. It's always people that look, well like me.---FMCNobody goes completely insane faster than a perfectly sane person, and if you don't get this don't worry and stay away from extremely stressful situations.---FMCFor a deodorant test instead of having these hockey stars come out and say how good it is for the 3-4 hours that they are playing, how about they do a real longevity test? That's what this stuff is advertising more and more (the stuff that I have says for 24 hour protection). Here's the test I want to see: grab a bum, wash them, down slather this stuff all over them, and send'em on their way. Then every night find them and take a whiff and see if this really stuff lasts.---FMCI'll take bull fighting seriously when the matador has spears in his back.---FMCThis next piece may be as uncomfortable as family dinner with my family when my grandpa uses the word darky to describe a black guy but what the hell I'm doing it anyway.Remember when that kid was suing Michel Jackson and he said that he could recognize Mike’s dick because of distinguishing characteristics? What's the big deal? I could do that. You know how I know that I could? Because if you give me a line-up of penises with Michael Jackson’s in there and it would be whitest member I've ever seen, I mean you've ever seen. Now I've seen a lot of dicks, like a lot a lot, like an uncomfortable amount, but come on I'm pretty sure everyone could match that cock to that man.---FMC