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Barry bares his heart and shares his biggest fear. Might this be your fear too? How Barry thinks he comes across on first dates. In other words—why Barry really thinks his first dates don’t usually lead to second dates. The sting of rejection. This has nothing to do with transplants. But finding love again requires taking risks—and that means facing uncertainty—the fear of rejection. We talk about this in terms of unhappy vs. uncertain. Because according to my unreferenced research, most people choose unhappiness versus uncertainty. Do you choose certain muted contentment and suffering versus uncertain potential joy and beauty? Knowing what you have might seem manageable—even if you’re miserable vs. the unknown—you know the unknown is risky and scary, but that’s where you have the hope and chance to discover the beauty, meaning, and love. Barry Reads two poems. I’ll attach those in the members-only email. Sign-up at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com The deep memory power of scent—the smell of your spouse’s shampoo, cologne, and my Mexican Mom’s flour tortillas. And so much more. Bulletos Barry's Biggest Fear Coming Across Desperate 12 Rules of Life--Jordan B. Peterson Finding the Beauty in Life Test vs. Failure--Do Semantics Ease Pain? Poem Reading: Strawberries More Rejection Soon Unhappy vs. Uncertain Perfect Moments Poem Reading: Daydreamin' (Warm Red Wine) You're Worthy Because You're Alive Organ Donor Card Wisdom From Thailand Thanks for listening.  Links for Part 1 and Part 2 of this series.  Barry's past episodes with his Once-Upon-A-Time story: The Phoenix is a Poet - Parts 1,2, and 3. https://myspousediedtoo.libsyn.com/episode-35-the-phoenix-is-a-poet https://myspousediedtoo.libsyn.com/episode-36-the-phoenix-is-a-poet-2-of-3 https://myspousediedtoo.libsyn.com/episode-37-the-phoenix-is-a-poet-3-of-3 Episode 7, Scent of a Woman: https://myspousediedtoo.libsyn.com/episode-7-scent-of-a-woman Listen to the first 90 seconds. Ted Talk: What a sex worker can teach us about human connection--Nicole Emma.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7xLfeTytns Jordan B. Peterson book 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos  Because you shouldn't have to journey alone, join me in the My Spouse Died Too community email list for members-only benefits: Behind-the-scenes commentary gives you deeper insight--helps you heal. Episode alerts so you'll know when a new episode is ready. Updates on past podcast guests because their journeys continue too. Plus more thoughts, resources, and random widowed journey stuff I discover. And it's the best way to contact me. Because you shouldn't have to journey alone. Sign-up now at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com. Hope. Heal. Find love again. ~ Emeric My Spouse Died Too podcast, images, logos, artwork copyright © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary. Music and lyrics © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary and Elena McCleary