Comedy
Welcome to episode 99 of the Modern Moron. In this episode we welcome back the Senator not that he was gone that long. I mostly berate and harass him which is no surprise, but I really do give him a hard time, downright mean. All because he has trouble pronouncing certain words, in this case the city of Corinth. There is so much moronoscity happening on so many levels in this episode. First of all we both refer to Corinth as an island. It is not. It’s actually an isthmus, which I would absolutely love to hear the senator take a shot at that word. An isthmus is a narrow strip of land connecting two larger masses of land. Second of all the Senator thinks it’s pronounced Cor-Nith. That’s right Cor-Nith. Normally that might not be such a big deal but when you are as steeped in the Catholic faith as he is, you hear the word Corinthians quite often. St. Paul was pen pals with someone there and his letters were apparently so important that they put them in a book… it’s called the Bible. So you hear it there in addition to hearing it numerous times throughout the 70’s from Ricardo Montalbon when referring to their high quality leather. Wait a minute where did that guy come from? So, the Senator, without pause, calls this Greek isthmus Cor-Nith. Why did it come up? Because the senator wanted to impress someone, a priest no less, by telling him he had visited that island in his world travels. Now, if you’re going to talk about, or in this case boast, about your world travels or that you’re a world traveler, wouldn’t you think part of that worldliness would include pronouncing the places you travel to correctly? And to refer to them by their correct geographic term? Not if your ego is as big as the Senator’s. Then he tries the argument that, “you knew what I was talking about” as if him botching the English language is mostly about my responsibility to decipher what comes out of his mouth and not his responsibility to articulate a clear thought. You know, like your mother used to tell you to “use your words.” Like a big boy! The reason this all came up is because the two of us had just come from a funeral. A buddy of ours from high schools mother passed away. And if you’re listening to this it’s because you’re in our demographic and our demographic is starting to attend more and more funerals, preferably not as the guest of honor. However, we’re at that stage and we’re going to talk more and more about death and dying as we all approach that bucket for one final kick. Which makes me think of the expression, “there are no atheists in foxholes.” And as we get older, or certainly as I get older, I’m thinking about or trying to connect with… what? God? Jesus, Muhammed, Ginesh… The Buddha? Mortality will tend to make most of us do that. As usual, I don’t really have a point, but I thought I would take all the humorous momentum of Cor-Nith and flush it down the toilet. We begin our conversation with the Senator asking me for permission to do something, which I find to be completely out of character for the Senator, and it has to do with a wild boar’s head… yes, the kind you hunt. Also, halfway through his story he spills his cocktail and really loses it. I find it entertaining but he is really pissed off about spilling his martini. And then… a few seconds later you can hear him spill it again! So much wonderful moronic entertainment awaiting you. That you would never get, by the way, with some celebrity infested podcast or with some brainiacs on some topic from NPR. This is true entertainment from the heartland. We also talk about Apple’s possible move to monitor and scan the contents of all iphones and the right to privacy. So our Moronoscity and thank you for listening… CLOSE - So there you have it, privacy on a leash courtesy of Apple. You know our conversation went on and on covering a number of additional topics that I may or may not get to because our next episode will be our 100th and I’m not quite sure what or who will be on that show. I wonder how long it will take to even get to it? Should we try for a celebrity? Maybe a celebrity only to this close knit group of listeners? And by close knit, I mean all four of us? The suspense is palpable isn’t it? Hope you have yourself a great day, evening or week, don’t forget to forward this episode to someone who might like it, we’ll see you next time and thank you for listening...