Comedy
Welcome to another episode of the Modern Moron and in this episode we turn the way back machine on to go all the way back to college. Specifically… actually it’s not specific at all, as my guest is my old college roommate. We reminisce about being college freshman away from home, the freedom we had and how much we would cut up and laugh like a couple of 12 years old’s having a sleepover… no offense to 12 year old’s. We talk about how I used to criticize his hygiene habits and behaviors and how much time he spent in front of the mirror. He used to sway back and forth in font of the mirror while brushing his teeth or primping in general. Why do I bring this up? Because he says that his son does the same thing! In passing he mentions that he also has a condition called Achondroplasia which affects growth of the limbs, spinal column and skull. This condition is more commonly known as dwarfism and in most cases requires multiple very invasive surgeries to cope with this condition, but fortunately his son has not, which leads to a conversation about situations in life that first appear as obstacles many times become opportunities to view the world from a broader perspective. Isn’t that nice? All from a guy who likes to sway back and forth in front of the bathroom mirror. My old roommate is very energetic, very passionate, gregarious and bombastic is the word he uses. You won’t need to strain to hear us or look at your phone to see if the volume will go up further… it’ll be fine. We start off with a short conversation that I almost left out. I was going to leave it out because it’s just too juvenile even for this show. We used to have this gibberish language we used to speak that no one understood, no one appreciated and it, to me anyway is a bit embarrassing at how juvenile it was then and obviously is now… but we still do it. It would almost be like listening to a couple of toddlers in a playpen talk to each other even though neither of them has the capability of speaking intelligently. It’s when my roommate says the gibberish word “Skurvathur”… I’m embarrassed saying it and I actually spelled it out in a text to him and he texted back with another gibberish word we used to use… a very riveting way to start a hard hitting podcast. “What podcast do you listen to? Well I listen to the true crime podcast, I listen to the conspiracy theory podcast… I listen to Joe Rogan… I listen to Pod Save America and I listen to a couple of senior citizens speak gibberish to one another. Yeah, thank you SO much for listening, but you might want to keep it under your hat if you’re at a cocktail party and the subject of podcasts comes up… say you listen to something from NPR or something on finance… makes you sound half intelligent. Also, either I curse more than I realize or my guest doesn’t curse at all, but I spent a good deal of time bleeping out my… I’m sorry I had our production staff edit out a lot of my foul language. Sounds more professional. It’s my college roommate on the Modern Moron... CLOSE - Isn’t it nice to reminisce about the old days? I only played Rugby for a year and I had totally forgotten about all those songs we used to sing after games and now that I think about it, most of those songs were EXTREMELY sexist. There were songs about Dinah and a song about a guy named “Abdul Abulbul Amir” and I don’t remember them being very complimentary. There would be a chorus, and during each chorus someone from the team would put their beer stein… or red solo cup on top of their head to indicate they were going to sing the next verse and the song would continue until no one could think of another disgusting verse. Rugby was not played in any high schools back then and I believe a lot of high schools do have Rugby programs now, but I wonder about the after game rituals. Also, it occurred to me that the only way to learn those songs was pretty much through oral tradition. There was no binder full of Rugby songs, there was no website for Rugby songs which by the way yes there is a website for Rugby songs and even recordings of drunken Rugby players singing those songs, they aren’t very audible as most of them are slurring their words but isn’t the internet… great? Or is it? I do have more from my conversation with my old college roommate and I hope our reminiscing brought back some memories of your post high school or college years. Man that was a long time ago and man do I have so much wisdom and so many opinions I constantly want to impart on whoever is within earshot throughout the day. Fortunately most of the time that only involves my poor dog. Thank you for listening… please forward this to ONE person you think might like this show and another thing about those Rugby songs?... they’re a lot more entertaining after about 3 pints. We’ll see you next time on the Modern Moron… Conditions and Diseases: Achondroplasia - Johns Hopkins Medical Dirty Rugby Song #1 - YouTube Dirty Rugby Song #2 - YouTube