Kids & Family
It has been 6 excruciating months since we lost our perfect and precious infant son, full term at 41 weeks. We had no idea anything was wrong when we went to the hospital. He was active, healthy and growing perfectly. After 3 previous healthy pregnancies that all went full term, including twins, we had no reason to suspect that our perfect son left us to be with our Heavenly Father. #stillbirth #infantloss #copingwithgrief We made our first video a few weeks after our tragedy. https://youtu.be/az6RrlniY-c We were hoping to try and make some sense of why this happened. We were lost, but we knew that no matter what, we wanted to remember the details and the pain that we were suffering. We couldn't give him anything, except an acknowledgment of all the reasons we wanted and loved him completely. There will never be the right words to express the emotions and grief that accompany the agony of losing a child - but hearing that we are not alone helps us. We hope it can help someone else too. A few things that I wanted to mention, but forgot. 1. Memory affects grief in unexpected ways. I'm not talking mom brain. I'm talking after playing the piano for 20 years, sitting down and not being able to associate which fingers with which keys or which notes. I lose time for hours at a time. At the end of the day, I have no idea what happened. 2. A few additional suggestions for how you can help someone going through this. I had a friend give me a few doTERRA oils: Cheer, Peace and Console. The days I remember to use them, I notice a definite increase in my spirit. Another friend gifted me a journal. It is so important to have a safe place to record your feelings. Even 6 months later I can read what happened in the early moments that followed this catastrophe and was blessed just yesterday to be reminded of an impression I received from our Lord and Savior. This is such a cherished gift. 3. Accept all the help you can. We do not have family that came to help, and it's one of the things I often lament. I would have appreciated more than anything someone to have come taken care of my big kids so I didn't have to face the responsibility. At the same time, I couldn't bear the thought of having them far from me. There is a fine line. If you know someone intimately that would trust you to come into their home and care for their children, be that angel to someone grieving if you can. Quiet moments of peace are so important.We love you, Walter.This is Episode #50: 6 Months After Losing Our Precious Full Term Infant Son Unexpectedly